Posted in blogging, Burnout, parenthood

Guess who’s back? Back again

Howdy Duffer Lovers, time to stick my head over the parapet once more.

I know things have been quiet but things have been changing (mostly for the better) here at Duffer Towers, and it’s safe to say that I’ve/We’ve been hella busy.


  • Christening
  • Moved house (Finally!!! It has a garden!!! And space!!)
  • Changed contracts at work to one that works a lot better for me. Where I don’t feel like telling the customer to “go forth and be fruitful”.
  • Went to see Belly in London.
  • Got a diagnosis for the lad so we can support him at school and he’s starting Reception next week.
  • Lots of back pain. But also discovered the highly functional, and highly uncomfortable delights of sports massage and things are a lot better.
  • Rented out the old place.
  • Refurbishing bits and bats to furnish the place as it’s amazing how much stuff you need when you’ve been living in a mortgaged cupboard for 10 years. Like a TV stand.
  • And I was out of action for 3-ish weeks with chicken pox. No fun if you’re north of 40.

The thing is, when you’ve burnt out before, you have to be aware that there are aspects of your life that you may need to set to one side for a while, so that you can attend to the business of living as your energy is a finite resource.

Back with the programme now though. Yeeehaaaa! x


Posted in art

RIP Billy Name

Billy Name
RIP Billy

His capture of the comings and goings at Andy Warhol’s Factory was fascinating, so if you’re into that era, try to get a look at his work.

Posted in blogging

Auditory Deficiencies: 12 Auditory Processing Deficiencies to Recognize in Your Child

I’ve linked to this as I try to make sense of a few things…..

This article provides helpful information about auditory deficiencies and how to recognize them in your child. If you find yourself constantly repeating directions and instructions for your child, you may think they have a hearing issue. However, what they may experience is a breakdown in their auditory system or auditory deficiencies that affect approximately… Read More

Source: Auditory Deficiencies: 12 Auditory Processing Deficiencies to Recognize in Your Child – Integrated Learning Strategies

Posted in Burnout, mental health

How to not hate your job after burning out.

After taking some time out with work related stress, you’d be forgiven for hoping that you might be able to pick up from a better place. As oppose to just going back to the place where you fell off.

Ultimately, the burned out person has a variety of possible options (in theory) but, as real life has a nasty habit requiring one to do things like pay for accommodation, heat, food and transport, a lot of people go back to where they were before, in a distinctly different shape to the one where they started, i.e. bright-eyed, keen and motivated.

squirrel eating a nut
This bears no resemblance to me on my return to work

So easing yourself back in (and it’s do-able if you plan…)

  1. If you’ve got Occupational health involvement, if possible, go back on a phased return, as is your right when returning from illness. It’ll mean that you can rest, test your boundaries, and possibly feedback that what is and isn’t working for you.
  2. Taking a more “back office” role for a little while.
  3. Remember that you are free to set boundaries. One of the reasons that people do burnout in a work context is by trying to be everything to all people.
  4. Self care, self care, self care. If you feel stressed, have 5 minutes, breath, drink tea, go outside and look at a tree.
  5. If it’s someone who’s bugging you, imagine them in dressed as the hind quarters of a pantomime horse, or something else, with a bread roll up their hooter, depending on how vindictive you’re feeling. Just make sure it’s ludicrous.
  6. Take your annual leave/vacation entitlement when you feel the need. If it’s beginning to get gnarly, take a day off – your mental health is more important.
  7. If it’s still craptacular, find a friend to look your CV over, and start looking for something else.
  8. Don’t laminate anyone’s tie – especially when they are still wearing it.
Posted in parenthood, political

Schools, holidays and the impact on the economy

Out of interest, has anyone done any research into the economic impact of the zero-tolerance policy on children being taken out of school for holidays?

  I’m curious because it won’t be long until we are affected by this, but I’ve also noticed that the silly holiday season is becoming more and more difficult in the wake of corporate efficiency programmes. I work in an environment where our customers work projects are starting to reach full speed in summer, when we have no staff.

No wonder people are stressed.  

Anyone got any thoughts on this? I sometimes think if you can highlight the impact on the wider economy, rather than highlighting what the personal financial impact is (as that’s not something the current government gives a rats arse about), there might be a proper reasonable high level response….

Posted in funny, misanthropy, Random, trains

Things that should be banned on trains once the temperature gets over 25 degrees Celsuis

Tune Sandwich
A tuna sandwich, the scourge of the hot queezy traveller
I’ve recently been away for work and it’s involved being on trains, in hot weather and often suited and booted – which is never a good way to travel at the best of times. It’s not like I’m expecting the Orient Express, but not being repulsed by the rest of my species would be a good starter for 10.

1. People who eat fish sandwiches. That have been allowed to warm up a bit.

Really, I like fish and I was trying not to breathe in lest I chunder. Followed by equally stinky crisps. I’m not one of natures’ spewers, but it’s not like you can ask the person in your overstuffed carriage to go sit somewhere else, or  sureptitiously shove hankies up your nostrils until they’ve stopped eating.

2. Getting your ugly feet out for all to see. The only people who should get their feet out on trains are babies. Or at least the folk who’ve worn comfy shoes for most of their lives so they don’t have the trotters of some grotesque hobbit/pterodactyl hybrid.

3. Manspreading – I know it’s hot but really? I need more than one buttock on a seat at a time. If you have a good solid reason for taking up this much space to ensure that “things” get air, at very least I demand either; a doctors note, and/or a letter from your partner.

4. Business folk who think they are terribly important. At the end of the day, we’re just trying to make a living, so why be a cockwomble?